Managing emotions is a key discipline in Stoicism, and for good reason. As human beings, we experience a wide range of emotions throughout our day.

Though emotions can be wonderful, they can also be heavy to carry. The Stoic understands that emotions do not necessarily indicate objective truth or tell us how we should react. One emotion the Stoics considered particularly dangerous was anger.

This article will discuss anger: why it feels good, why it can be so destructive, and some practical techniques for managing it.

Defining anger

According to Merriam-Webster, anger is “a strong feeling of being upset or annoyed because of something wrong or bad, or an intense emotional state of displeasure.” This definition is interesting because there is a Stoic lesson within it.

The second part - “an intense emotional state of displeasure” - is quite accurate. But the preceding suggestion that something is simply “wrong” or “bad” requires a Stoic qualification. The event itself and our judgment of it are not necessarily the same thing.

From the Stoic perspective, anger would therefore be similar to the second part of that definition, with perhaps an added warning about how destructive it can become.

Experiencing anger

Anger is a human emotion, and nearly everyone has experienced it. One fascinating thing about anger is that it can feel good. When we are angry, we do not feel evil. In fact, anger can often feel pleasurable. That is partly how we justify such destructive energy.

Experiencing anger can be like riding a roller-coaster: you stop thinking about the danger and potential consequences, and simply react and lean into the emotion.

Why does anger feel so good? Sadness does not, for example, even though both are generally considered unpleasant emotions.

The answer, I think, helps explain why the Stoics described anger as temporary madness—a destructive passion to be eradicated rather than merely moderated.

Anger is dangerous because of this combination: it can be incredibly destructive while also feeling good, encouraging more of it. Anger compromises our ability to think rationally, and when reason is compromised, appropriate action becomes far more difficult.

Managing anger

Seneca argued that anger requires our consent and can be intercepted before reason is overwhelmed. A careful distinction is important here: Seneca is not saying that we can prevent the initial spark of anger. He is saying that we can nip it in the bud before it becomes destructive.

But how do we do so?

The following are four practical Stoic strategies for managing anger. They are not the only four; they are simply those I have personally found most useful.

Delay your response

There is a gap in which we either assent to anger or do not. The larger that gap becomes, the more likely we are to make the right choice—if that is what we truly want.

In practice, you feel a spark of anger and choose not to react immediately. Wait. Give it a minute. Five minutes. An hour. However long it takes for that spark to dissipate.

Relax the body

Anger carries an expression, both facial and bodily. Most of us can quickly recognize an angry face, voice, or manner of pacing. Even our breathing tends to quicken.

One practical strategy is to consciously do the opposite.

Relax your face. Slow your breath. Lower your voice. Stop pacing. Sit down.

This can help tell your body, “I’m not angry anymore.” It is surprisingly effective.

Practise empathy and humility

When someone cuts you off in traffic, practise empathy and humility. Perhaps they have a sick child in the back. Perhaps you cut someone off yesterday.

Remember that they are human too.

Contemplate mortality

We regularly forget about death amid the busyness of life. Bringing it to the forefront can put things into perspective. Remembering that you will die someday reveals how many of life’s irritations simply do not matter. Suddenly, someone cutting you off in traffic is no great offence.

Closing remarks

Anger holds a special place in Stoicism because of its particularly toxic nature. It is normal to feel its initial spark; we are all human. Luckily, the Stoics—along with modern therapists—have developed many methods for managing it.

We need only choose to practise them, and anger can begin to loosen its grip on us.

Brandon is most well-known for his podcast, The Strong Stoic Podcast, where he discusses philosophical ideas both solo and with guests. He also coaches individuals to help them be their best selves, writes articles, plays music, manages projects, and several other things.

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