How to live our brief lives

I once overheard someone tell a child, “Being kind to someone is never a bad thing.” Being kind, caring, compassionate, loving, loyal, sincere, and high-minded causes little harm to others. Stoics argued that a well-lived life is a virtuous life.

No one will live forever. The works and impact of each of us will eventually be lost to history. The most well-known and admired individuals are no exception. It is not until one comes to grips with this reality that one can release their futile grasp for worldly greatness. 

Acknowledgement that we will be forgotten does not remove the purpose for living. Instead, this understanding encourages people to live their best life today. To live their best life, people need to free themselves from the attachments and indifferents that they are tied to. One question that may arise then is, “If we are not to live for fame, fortune, or other attachments, what are we to pursue?”

Seneca stated that living a life of virtue should be our main objective. 

This may be taught quickly and in a few words. Virtue is the only good, or at least there is no good without virtue; virtue itself is situated in our nobler part, that is, the rational part. - Seneca, Moral Letters, 71.32

The desire for fame and fortune

We live at a time in which this advice needs to be shared. Consumerism, technology, the global economy, and the ever-present desire for fame and fortune are linchpins in today’s society. People with wealth and popularity are as brazen as ever. Some have gone so far as to look into removing a bridge used by fellow citizens for convenience. Some have spent large sums of money on tickets for rides to outer space. Some have purchased whole islands. 

It isn’t just the uberwealthy who pursue a lifestyle that is superficial. Many people find themselves constantly comparing their capital (economic and/or social) with others. This comparison robs them of inner peace and tranquility. Instead of being at peace with what we have, we look at others with disdain, contempt, jealousy, or admiration. 

We look down on those who have less. We are envious of those who have more. We set goals around the number of friends, likes, and shares they have on social media. We push hard to become influencers. We pay attention to their net worth and ever strive for more of what the world has deemed to be the reason for our existence. Our short-lived standing in the world should not hold that strong of an impression, yet sadly it has a power grasp. One that is extremely hard to get away from. 

Virtue as the source of happiness

Instead of feeling honourable, worthy, popular, or important based on social status garnered through finances, relationships, and other attachments, Stoics argued that virtue is source of happiness.  

So show them those qualities that are entirely up to you: sincerity, dignity, endurance of hardship; not pleasure-seeking, not complaining of your lot, needing little; kindness and generosity; being modest, not chattering idly, but high-minded. - Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 5.5

To be at peace, truly at peace, we need to do a better job of living the virtuous life. We need to reflect on how we treat others. We need to be happy with who we are as people. We need to determine how we can be better. We need to own and be accountable for our character. 

Our virtue is one of the very few things that is completely in our control. How we treat others and respond to circumstances is the truest indicator of our wealth. 

Pursuing virtue is under our control

It would be a wonderful world if we all stopped worrying about people’s checking accounts, cars, employer, and various other lifestyle choices. That, however, is not in our control. What is in our control is our own virtue and our regular assessment of it. 

We will all die and be forgotten, but living a life of virtue will be the one thing that makes one’s time on this earth worth living.

Michael Donaldson, PhD is an instructional coach for the Baltimore City Public School System. In addition to practicing Stoicism, he is a proud husband, father, educator, and author of the book “Lessons Learned: And Other Poetic Musings.”

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